The Helper that Refuses Help
“I lift up my eyes to the mountains—where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth." (Psalm 121:1-2) ~NIV
Real MOMent
My blog posts, up until now, have been centered on MOMents shared between me and my 6-year-old son. I knew in due time, my baby girl, my second child, would spark inspiration when God saw fit.
My 2-year-old daughter is so different from my first child in many ways . If I had to use one word to describe her it would be “HELPER.” She loves helping me in the kitchen either by stirring a dish, sweeping with a broom that is much too big for her size, or wiping up her own mess that she makes. She is always willing to help. Her helpful demeanor is evident even outside our household and is displayed throughout her school day with her friends and teachers. (See image below of her helping a friend at school continue to move forward when stuck)
In addition to being a helper, like many children her age , she is testing and exploring her independence. Her desire to be independent at this stage in life is much stronger willed than what I can remember my son’s to have been. I recently thought about her bold path to independence during our nightly bedtime routine, when she refused to let me help her put on her pajamas. In a fiery tone she told me “NO MOMMY! LET ME DO IT!” which she then followed up by snatching the clothing from my hands. To let me know she meant serious business about not accepting my help, she moved to the other side of the room. I knew she was able to put on her clothes because I had seen her do it before. However, I realized something that would be an obstacle for her that she did not: one of the long sleeves in her pajama shirt was turned inside out. I watched her begin to struggle with the task that night and after frustration set in, she surrendered and accepted my help previously offered. It was at that moment, I began to think about all the times when I refused assistance from others or even the times when I reluctantly accepted help that I knew I needed.
What was that about? Pride maybe? Am I a 2-year-old? While my daughter is in her growing stages and seeking to gain her independence, what is it that I gain by not accepting help at times when I knew I needed it and prayed to God for it, from others who offered it?
MOMent of Clarity
There are several Bible verses that support the reasons why we should help others in need. These mentioned below are only a few out of many that can be found:
Whoever is kind to the poor lends to the Lord, and he will reward them for what they have done. Proverbs 19:17~NIV
In everything I did, I showed you that by this kind of hard work we must help the weak, remembering the words Lord Jesus himself said: ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.’ Acts 20:35~ NIV
Give to the one who asks you, and do not turn away from the one who wants to borrow from you. Matthews 5:42~NIV
A generous person will prosper; whoever refreshes others will be refreshed. Proverbs 11:25~ NIV
If the Word of God puts so much emphasis on Christians helping others, then I must believe that God has and will put me in situations where the help that I need might come from other believers in Christ who He has allowed to cross my path. This statement still supports that all my help comes from the Lord. If one of my sole responsibilities as a parent is to help my children develop within their early stages of life, for me to be able to carry out that responsibility, they must accept my help. (I understand how the word “help” is defined, will differ from person to person and family to family). While we are called to be helpers as Christians, being a helper and having a helpful spirit, like my daughter, doesn't mean she/we are not worthy of receiving help. If we ask God for help, we might have to accept that it will come in the form of support from people around us without feeling prideful, embarrassed, or less than. Plus our God is omniscient and places who He sees fit to help when life causes one of our pajama sleeves to be turned inside out.
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Praising God for providing me with people over the years, that I could truly lean on. I can think of the many times when various people have been put in my path to pray with me, for me, offer their time, experience, or just their listening ear. Out of those various experiences of God providing extraordinary help through ordinary people, I would like to highlight the coauthor of this blog, Allison. Having the opportunity to serve God through our shared experiences in motherhood is full circle. When I experienced post partum depression shortly after given birth to my first child, it was the encouraging words spoke to me by Allison that lifted my spirits during a confusing and sad time. I praise God for knowing who to put in my path and providing the help I needed at a point when I didn't even know what I needed. |
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Typically, when we think of our Bible characters and their aligned stories, the fact that they had to accept help or was provided help to accomplish God's will for their lives can be easily missed. Revisit the Biblical text below. In Genesis 22, we rarely think about the fact that when Abraham went to sacrifice his son, he brought two of his servants with him. This was important for us to know because the servants were mentioned in verses 3 and 5. While there is not much details there, one could easily agree that Abraham brought them with him because he might have needed help on his journey to complete the task God set out for him.  |
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Dear God, Thank You for being You and not allowing me to be who I would be without You. God I know there are times when I think I know what is best for my life. There are times when I have my own thoughts about what the answers should be for the prayers that I render to You. Thanks for times in my life when You have humbled me and allowed me to gracefully say "I need Your help." Thank You for the other times, when I didn't have to even whisper a word, but You answered my cry for assistance. Thank You for the people You have placed on my journey that made it their business and at times their priority to lend their hands toward my needs. God, You always know what I need and who I need it to come from through You. Please guide me in this lesson of acceptance of other's help with my children, not only by my words but by my actions. In Your Son's name we pray, AMEN |
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