Obedience isn't always a fairytale
“But the Advocate, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you all things and will remind you of everything I have said to you. "
John 14:26- NIV
Real MOMent
For a while now, the Holy Spirit had been nudging me to mend a relationship with a family member. You have to love it when the Holy Spirit uses your own seed to convict you and that’s exactly what happened. One afternoon, on the way home from school, my son goes “Mom I have something to tell you.” I calmly replied back with “Sure! What’s up? “He proceeded with “you have to promise me, I won’t get in trouble” and before I could respond, he burst into tears “You will NEVER forgive me!”
Wow! What have I been doing or not doing that would make my child think that what occurred on the playground that day would be unforgivable by his own mother?
My son and I talked about the incident and discussed the importance of forgiveness. While he walked away from our 10 minute conversation knowing because God forgives, there will never be a situation where I (his mom) would not forgive him—I walked away with instant conviction that had been building for 10+ months. The Holy Spirit, the voice that had been haunting me for some time now, was speaking louder than ever before. My son didn’t know I was holding on to a situation with someone close where I needed to have a forgiving heart, but God did.
I knew what I had to do as I refused to be a hypocrite to my child.
Later that night, I purposely started to work on something to keep myself busy and take my mind off the task I knew I needed to complete. But as we all know, nothing that we can create on earth, including being fake busy, will ever overpower God! That definitely applied in that moment as the Holy Spirit screamed, “Do it now!” Before I could think about it any longer, I grabbed my phone (without talking it over with anyone), wrote the message, and immediately hit SENT. IT WAS DONE! A heavy weight had been lifted (one that I didn’t even know I was carrying) and the little voice that I had been intentionally disregarding for months was now quiet.
The next morning, I did get a response. However, it wasn’t met with the same openness that I had presented in my text, which suggested a path of forgiveness for both parties, the night before. After reading what I perceived to be an empty reply, another little voice quickly tried to fill my thoughts, but then the Holy Spirit entered the room again…
MOMent of Clarity
The message from the Holy Spirit was so clear to me. Our obedience to God and following the Holy Spirit should not be contingent on someone else’s response or a perceived fairytale/ happy ending. If there was instant reconciliation at the point when I reached out, I would have missed the blessing that comes with listening to the voice of the Holy Spirit and the freedom and joy it brings to do what is right for no other reason, but to be obedient. This moment, for me, was one of clear spiritual growth. The old me would have let the ugly thoughts and bad memories continue to swarm through my head. However, the evolving me accepts and still has to remind myself that God doesn’t speak to everyone in the same way at the same time, BUT it doesn’t mean He is not moving. Isaiah 55:8 reflects this perfectly “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways declares the Lord.” The door of forgiveness is not one that I believe is closed for the situation. There was a process that God crafted in His perfect timing and designed specifically for me. Why should that other person not be afforded the same? Until God sees fit to provide a happy ending to that situation (if it is in His will), I can walk away with confidence in Him knowing that while obedience doesn’t always end in a fairytale, it is always a blessing.
 In this week’s Praise moment, I am giving thanks for the many times in my life when the Holy Spirit never gave up on me, when I ignored a sign or turned a deaf eye to the voice in my head. I am praising God for the ultimate gift He left us and a true sign of His love for us. The song “Holy Spirit You Are Welcome Here” is a call for me to remember that the Holy Spirit is a gift that should be welcomed with open arms. There are a few renditions to this song. See the video below for one of my favorites. Chorus: Holy Spirit You are welcome here Come flood this place And fill the atmosphere Your glory God Is what our hearts long for To be overcome By Your presence, Lord |
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 Dear God, Thanks for your gift of the Holy Spirit. Please forgive me when I know it is You trying to get through me and I intentionally dismiss the little voice in my head. Thank You for not giving up on me and for always meeting me where I am. I am so grateful for Your grace and mercy You have provided me many times in my life. Please help me understand when others need that same grace and mercy even if it doesn't necessarily feel good to me. Please help me always welcome the Holy Spirit with open arms and seek Your guidance through it. Please always help me remember that being obedient to Your word and Your example is more important than the outcome. Amen. |
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